Hey, I was just calling to ask if you got home safe. I know it’s Saturday at 3 am and we haven’t spoken in months, I just got a hunch that you were going out and thought to ask. and yes... I know it’s been a while since I’m the designated one. I am fine, thank you for not caring. It’s been a long time I think I’m finally healing but then I get this urgent feeling. I want you to know how I’ve been doing. When you think of the bigger picture. Maybe it is for the greater good that you haven’t called. But I just wish you’d done already. I came to that bench that used to be our spot by the park. How you called and we never asked where should we meet. Our hearts led. I found a lot of things to look forward to. My best friends’ birthday, my newborn niece, the re-recording of a favorite album of mine… but in all these circumstances your shadow lingers. I still save you a seat during the holidays. I still send your Fathers way a gift on Xmas. Although I know you changed address a long time ago. You flew. I see us. in every problem I get to know about other couples. I picture you in my head. What would I have said if I thought this through? Why didn’t I leave when I still had it in me to begin with? So many questions in my head I’ll never get an answer to. But I deserve someone who will listen. Voicemail again. Are you okay? Did your bruise ever fade? Did you ever buy those headphones you so desperately wanted? So many questions I never got the chance to ask. Poems written by my own hand. In between each Voicemail. I remember it all. How you said you’d call. You’d return one out of the thousands of calls I have made. It always was a one-way ticket to you. I never came back the same.
November 17th, 2021
No hay comentarios:
Publicar un comentario